Toxic Co-Parenting and CPS: What You Need To Know

A coiled snake
A toxic co-parent is like a snake lying in wait, about to strike at any moment

A toxic co-parent, by definition, is a former spouse who attempts to turn the thoughts and feelings of their children against the other parent. Tools like bad-mouthing, blaming, and other forms of manipulation are used to achieve this terrible result and, if successful, can have catastrophic results that can ruin relationships for life. This is also often referred to as ‘Parental Alienation’.

So what does this have to do with CPS you may wonder? After all, this tends to be more of a divorce related issue, and less of a child abuse related issue, doesn’t it? Well, perhaps. In some case, the two matters are completely unrelated. However, there are instances where the toxicity of one parent, in their efforts to alienate the other parent, become so heinous that CPS becomes involved.

In an effort to malign the other parent, some parents make the mistake of calling CPS to regale agents with tales of the other parent’s abusive nature. Sometimes these false allegations have the desired outcome, and the parent who has been lied about will lose custody of their children. However, in many cases, this tactic actually backfires.

CPS wasn’t created to help parents work through their personal issues and fight about custody of their children. The agency exists to remove children from situations where they’re being abused or neglected. However, once children are in the hands of CPS hands, parents have no control over where they’ll be placed.

Manipulative parents who choose to involve CPS out of spite, run the risk of losing their children as well.

CPS agents are a little like Kudzu. Once planted, it is nearly impossible to get rid of it, and it can quickly become invasive. In the same way, once you choose to involve CPS in your life, you have provided the agency with a gilded invitation to snoop around in your home, your parenting, and your choices. Once they are involved you cannot change your mind and ask them to leave you alone. As a result, they can wreak havoc in your life, causing trauma for you and your child, and can often turn a bad situation into something much worse.

CPS is sometimes inundated with cases where parents seek an advantage in the divorce proceedings, and make false claims of abuse in order to secure it. While CPS agents sometimes realize what is happening, the reality is often lost on the child involved. Why? Because every time a CPS report gets filed, the child gets interviewed about the allegedly abusive parent. Over time this can work to reinforce the idea in the child’s mind that the alienated parent is someone they should be afraid of. This is a subtle, but very effective way used  by toxic parents to alienate the other parent.

Parental alienation is a form of child abuse. It can be very hard to prove, and very difficult to combat in situations where authorities can’t see it. However, the results are devastating and can last a lifetime. If you are dealing with an ex who is attempting to alienate you, or has lied about you to CPS, contact us immediately at 866 766 5245. Your situation needs immediate attention from an experienced CPS defense attorney, and you cannot afford to wait and just hope for a good outcome. Call us today. We have spent decades defending those falsely accused of abuse, and protecting parental rights. We can help you too.


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